Wednesday, April 23, 2025
Time: 7:50 AM
Song: If I Ever Leave This World Alive
Artist: Flogging Molly
Mode of Consumption: Listening to MP3s on shuffle while driving to work.
Link to song: https://open.spotify.com/track/6l6UyIBwaNibzWZKfGkmJW?si=2b03f41f12a64ad8
I hit the halfway point of my drive, and think, isn’t this the perfect midweek song? I mean it’s two days into the work week, and there’s three more to go.
It drips with that angst of wanting nothing more than to be free of responsibility. Yet, it also has this underlying current of hope, that if we can just make it through today, then we will almost be to the weekend.
I think I first encountered this song in 2016. That was my first year after switching jobs from the newspaper to proposal writing.
That was a hard year for me. I was a bit lost, having spent the better part of the last five years or so completely consumed by work. Now, I was at a gig where I was in complete learning mode, which sometimes led to long stretches of not knowing what the heck I was supposed to be doing to occupy my time.
The issues didn’t end at five every evening.
All of a sudden, I had free time, and I wasn’t really sure what to do with it. Jodi had her own routines, having grown accustomed to having the evenings to herself since I worked evenings at the newspaper.
So, what to do?
I worried maybe I wasn’t wired any longer for being at home at night. I needed that nightly deadline. That constant push.
I suppose I was a bit depressed during that year. Maybe even felt like I wasn’t sure I’d make it out alive.
But I did. I started finding my interests. I got used to my new work flow, new co-workers.
And in a blink, it’s been almost ten years.
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